Saturday, August 31, 2013

Sometimes it rains.

This morning my little family and I were headed out the door to go on a hike, when suddenly out of nowhere, water started falling out of the sky. Hard. like someone just knocked over a bucket full of water on accident.  I was looking forward to today all week, so yes, I was disappointed, and so was the hubby.  There was no way I was going to let that toppled, over flowing bucket, falling from the sky ruin my family day.  So we decided to do a couple of things I have been wanting to do for a while...

We made play dough.. purple play dough.  I don't know if my rowdy little toddler has ever played with play dough before.. at least not to my forever fading memory... and I have always wanted to make it... at least I have been wanting to make it for the last year... we all sat in the middle of the kitchen floor making snakes and hand prints for two hours straight.  Though, I am pretty sure my nearly 30 yr old hubby had way more fun than my two year old.  Isn't that why most men have kids? So they can have play time too?  I don't know about you, but I am all about the nap time..

After mommy got tiered of cleaning up play dough messes, the hubby set up the play tent in the living room while I made paleo style pumpkin pancakes.  Probably not my favorite recipe, but they were still good.  For another two hours the house was full of loud giggles and random tickle fights.  We all huddled in the miniature sized tent and stayed in as long as we could stand it. (Well, until nap time, which has its own time slot in our house, for very good reasons of course..)

Today made me remember how precious life is, and how forgiving a family can be.  We as mommies are way too hard on ourselves.  We struggle with trying to be perfect.  The laundry has to be done on time, dishes have to be cleaned, dinner has to be healthy with plenty of green food, you have to be fit, or 'thin' for your own self esteem, we get mad if we accidentally yelled too much one day (mostly due to lack of sleep)...Which all of those things are great things to strive for and to accomplish... BUT.. if a day goes by (or several days) and something doesn't get done... or the husband has to eat left overs in the fridge instead of coming home to a hot meal... FORGIVE yourself...

We need to spend more time loving those that need it most.. and less time worrying about making everything around us perfect.  Life isn't perfect.. You can't control the rain, but time spent with those most precious to you.. now that's perfect.. ;)

I don't ever want a day to go by where I let the rain ruin what is most important to me: the angel faces I live with... so take a break, and go spend time with those you love the most!

Monday, August 26, 2013

Oh Motherhood.

It has, yet again, been a long time since I have blogged.  I now have two babies: a rowdy two year old, and a needy 4 month old.  I never understood before why my own mother always seemed to be off her rocker by just a bit...or a by a mile...  I get it.  Never again will I think that she is completely nuts.  Well.. maybe just a little crazy, but I understand why now.

Mothers across the world are delusional from lack of sleep, from lack of grown up contact on a day to day basis, from lack of intellectual stimulation because you have to sing songs like ba ba black sheep, and old McDonald fifty-ca-trillion times in a row... 

Drivers beware, at any moment you could be driving next to a mother who is functioning on only 4 or less hours of sleep!  (I am pretty sure this is why women drivers get a bad rap)  If you see a disheveled mother who is walking around with only make up on one of her eyes because she forgot to do the other eye... don't judge!  Buy her a coffee and tell her she is doing a good job!

I can't remember the last time it was when I felt pretty, or thin and lean, or even healthy!  I cannot remember the last time I have slept through the night.. because it seems like every time baby number two sleeps through the night.. baby number one has a nightmare.  I don't even remmeber if I brushed my teeth this morning??  And I just remembered that I didn't eat breakfast.  Everyone else is taken care of: the husband made it out  the door to work on time, the girls are fed and dressed.. everyone is happy.. for this one moment...

I live in yoga pants because none of my pre-pregnancy clothes fit... If I were to be completely honest.. none of my pre-marriage clothes fit!!  I gave up on ever fitting in a size 8 again and just threw those away.. If I make it out of my nursing tank and into a real bra on any given day, that is a real accomplishment for me! 

I have a hard time keeping the house clean: I have ADD which makes it really hard to stay focused on any one task at any given time... so throw in two little human beings that can go bazurk at any given moment... you get the idea..  My one goal every day is to make dinner.  If I can get dinner made, I feel slightly more accomplished!

I have learned that a poop explosion is more stressful than the stock market crashing.  I have learned that screaming babies in public are more embarrassing than someones pants falling off in an auditorium full of thousands of people and having it broadcast to the world.  I have learned that I am the BOSS!! Not my bossy two year old.

BUT I have also learned... that hearing the words, "Mommy I love you" are some of the most precious words I will ever hear in the world.. sloppy toddler kisses and baby cuddles make any awful day worth it...  Seeing my toddler hug and love on her little sister make all the stressful moments and worrying if they will ever get along go away...

Feeling two little hands grab onto either side of my face and say, "Mommy, good job!" makes the day go a little smoother!  The messes are not that big of a deal... the mound of laundry no longer makes my hair fall out.. the dishes in the sink can wait again for another day...  If my toddler thinks I am doing a good job.. who am I to tell her otherwise?

All this to say.. mommies of the world, You are doing a good job, and you are not alone!  Don't let life stress you out, and hold on tight to the precious little moments that make your heart melt....  I thank God (though not nearly enough) that he has blessed me with the responsibility of raising these two angel faced girls... I wouldn't have it any other way.. Except maybe having a little more accesability to some chocolate every now and again :)